This year’s Bravo Awards were hosted by Kathy Griffin. The less than liked comedian did at least one, semi-humorous skit and had plenty to say during her stint. Here are some of the most, off-the-wall shots from the festivities.

And the Award goes to Sluttiest Bitch on TV!
I didn’t watch the awards, but yeah this looks like Tila won some award. I’m not sure of the purpose of the Bravo awards, but I always thought they were given to the winner of the best shows on Bravo. Either way, I can only imagine what this hooch won! Hooker of the year maybe?

Who’s Zebra threw up?
Not sure who the hell Rachel Dratch is, but that is one ugly dress. The expression on her face seems to match the ugliness of her outfit. It looks as though everyone thought the Bravo Awards were that unimportant they just threw on any old thing!

PETA Called: They Want their Ostrich Back
I have to wonder if PETA thew blood on Nikki Taylor’s shoes because the former fashion model has gone color blind. While the top of her outfit looks okay, it looks like she killed an ostrich and wrapped the dead carcus around her waist to make her skirt.

Cho Whose Your Super Hero?
Margaret Cho has never been known for her fashion sense, but the blue spandex totally reminds me of Superman or some other tight wearing superhero. Too bad it doesn’t go with the knee high boots, black top or assorted array of tattoos. While she definitely looks like someone who could have dated Quentin Tarantino, I’m not sure that’s a good selling point.

Hey! Look at My Tits!
I could only imagine that Lauren Hutton wore this see-thru top to show off her bra so we all wouldn’t notice the humongous gap between her front teeth. The only other conclusion I’ve come up with is maybe its her plea with Hooters to give her a job. It’s not like she’s doing much of anything else these days anyway!

Look Ma! I made My Dong Bigger!
Lance Bass helped Kathy Griffin out in a series of skits, one in which it looks like he’s going to shove a dildo up her…well I don’t really want to think of where. All I can imagine is he had to use a fake dong since his real one is to small to get on camera.

Here’s more proof Lance has a little wee wee….

As you can see it doesn’t take much to cover up his ding dong.

Oops! My Boobie Fell Out…Again!
Hasn’t the Janet-Justin thing been overdone? Though I do think the prosthetic boobs was a nice touch. It’s sure to be the latest way women in Hollywood decide to make their boobs bigger.

Pause…and Take a Silent Moment…
I think this picture speaks for itself. I don’t need to say a word…just sit and wonder how the train wreck started. Poor plaid…it didn’t ask to be put on her body. Much like Britney’s babies that came out of her vagina, the plaid didn’t ask to be here.

WTF is That?!
After seeing this, that’s what my boyfriend, Dom, said about model Holly Kiser’s outfit. I mean, c’mon! Her tits aren’t even big enough to hold up those belt straps and someone needs to call PETA pronto. It looks like a whole fleet of birds have been plucked to make her skirt (or maybe they just skinned a rabbit). Sorry, I’m not down with my fur/feather knowledge.

Is this a picture of Perez Hilton’s Evil Nemesis?
At least his hair’s not multi-colored. You have to give Christian Siriano that much credit. Still, he’s equally as creepy and disgusting. I don’t care who this guy is or what he designs. He’s a troll. Enough said!

Jenny Craig Called…We want You Caroline!
Didn’t Caroline used to be on The Biggest Loser? I guess she didn’t follow their diet. She must have consulted Kirstie Alley for weight loss tips instead, because wow, Caroline has become a heifer! In the battle of the twinkies, I think it’s safe to say they won.

Technorati Tags: Caroline Rhea, Margaret Cho, Lance Bass, Dildo, Boobies, Bravo Awards, Nikki Taylor, Kathy Griffin, Christian Siriano, Lauren Hutton, Holly Kiser, Worst Dressed, Kat Von D, Tila Tequila, Hooker

You all might remember Stephanie Ragusa. She was a middle school teacher at Davidson Middle School. She taught in Tampa, Florida. She was just 28 (now 29) when she was accused of five counts of lewd and lascivious battery. She was accused of having sex with at least one 15 year old boy and multiple others have come forward to say they were bopping this somewhat young, math teacher. The boy in question said they had sex no less than five times, and by then Ragusa had moved on to teaching at Martinez Middle School in Lutz, FL where she was put on paid administrative leave.

This seems like a pretty open and shut case. The boy said she blew him twice, screwed him three times and he knew intimate details, such as placement and descriptions of groin tattoos on Ragusa’s genital region. That’s just the first boy. She was also charged with lewd and lascivious battery and two counts of unlawful sexual activity with another 15 year old. It’s pretty clear she’s been getting freaky with the youngsters and now, she has her eye on a new, much younger man.

From her jail cell, where she is being held without bond, awaiting trial, Ragusa was caught trying to have a letter delivered to a possible new boy toy, Nick Bollea (aka Hogan). Just one month shy of his 18th birthday, the jailed, troubled son of former wrestler and entertainer, Hulk Hogan, would fit well in Ragusa’s arsenal of teen lovers. Luckily for her, she saved her declarations of love for another letter, or perhaps a public meeting.

The acne faced teacher might be reaching since Nick is two years older than her last two lovers, but maybe her time in prison has helped her to move on to 17 year olds. The letter was supportive of Nick, despite his recorded whining and whimpering as well as his ability to blame his passenger (who is in the hospital – unable to care for himself), John Graziano, for his current jail sentence. Stephanie hopes that Nick “keeps his chin up”. She’d be the one to know from experience. It makes deep throating easier.

Ragusa wants Nick to know he’s not alone and she sympathizes with him. Their cases are so similar after all (yeah, I always compare child rapists with assholes who can’t drive when they race on main roads). They both receive “fan mail” and more attention than President Bush or even the recent Earthquake. Yeah, okay, like I barely even knew her name, only remembering her when I saw she screwed a bunch of teenagers. If you want to check out the full letter, you can at TMZ.

While Ragusa was caught trying to pass on the letter, lets hope Nick doesn’t take her bait and avoids contact with this nut job like the plague. If he did, it’d be the first smart thing he’s done in a long time. If he takes after mom, Linda (who is dating his 19 year old friend) he might just get to know Ragusa. Either way, its demented.

Technorati Tags: Stephanie Ragusa, Nick Bollea, Nick Hogan, TMZ, letter, teenage lovers, child rape, school teacher, Florida, crime

Okay, so I gave you pictures of the best and worst of the awards, but then I found pictures feature things happening that are just downright weird. For your entertainment, I give you the weirdness (or is it weirdest?) of the MTV Movie Awards:

Dana Carvey is pregnant?!
Seriously, look at that baby bump! It’s bigger than the one on Nicole Kidman! I don’t mean to brag, but I think I’m going to be the first to report on the “expecting” Daddy! Good luck with the delivery Dana. We hear birth can be rather painful!

Ode to the $2 Hooker with the Leather Whip
I know these are the costumes the Pussycat Dolls wore to perform at the MTV Movie Awards, but who the heck picked out these outfits? They look like their going to a backwoods leather bar to meet their Biker Momma.

Jack Black Becomes a Super Hero
Who knew that all it took was a little bit of marker to turn Jack Black into Ironman? Seriously, with just a few more touch ups he will look like Robert Downey Jr.’s twin!

Downey Jr. responsible for Shenanigan
I knew that Jack Black’s transformation into a super hero was too good to be true. It was just Robert Downey Jr. leaving a drawn signature on Black’s tummy. Look! He even signed his nipple! I don’t know if that’s funny or downright disturbing. Maybe a little of both. Hope that’s not permanent marker!

Random Homeless Beggar?
I don’t know who Jonah Hill is, but dang is he looking like a homeless beggar. If he’s a B-lister why not try and look more presentable? If you want to be memorable, don’t come in your best bag walker outfit. Get some class!

Mr. Rogers and His Tranny
Wow. I can barely comment on this. As Tom morphs into the Scientologist version of Mr. Rogers, Katie is becoming more mannish. Look at that mop top and the way she hulks over Tom. We all knew Tom loved the c-ck, but couldn’t he just have found a guy instead of morphing Katie Holmes into one?

She makes Me Look Hotter
Lindsay Lohan has the superior smirk of a girl who happens to be standing next to Bruce Willis in a dress. Rumor is pretty damn ugly and Lindsay knows it. Unfortunately for LoHo, the only way she gets deemed “hottest in the bunch” is to stand next to an ugly person. In the meantime, Rumor has her own little private smirk. You know, like the “I just put herpes on your dildo” or “I sucked SamRo’s monstrous clit first” look of satisfaction. I guess that just proves that it doesn’t take a hot person to pass on the STDs.

The Flowers and the Pillowcase
Yeah…Rain Wilson wore flowers and a teddy bear, but Megan Fox wore just a pillowcase. They make an unlikely pair, but just one slip (or tear) on stage would have given the audience a flash show they might (or might not -depending on the flashee) have desired. Let’s just hope neither dropped anything, like the soap!

I have a Big Spaceship
I figured it was only a matter of time before Tom converted Chris Brown and the rest of young Hollywood into Scientologists. As the space ranger, Brown is here to be the guide that welcomes the Mothership. What a cool job!

J-Lo Called; She Wants her Ghetto Booty Back!
Vanessa is looking a little, round in the rear. She’d do Sir Mixalot proud. Still, what’s that in the front? Disney might be shocked if we alluded to a baby bump, or maybe just shocked at the prospect of Zac Efron spawn on the Earth!

Technorati Tags: Vanessa Hudgens, Disney, Zac Efron, Robert Downey Jr., Megan Fox, Katie Holmes, tranny, Tom Cruise, J-Lo, Jack Black, Dana Carvey, pregnant

Today is the day for the newest big Britney custody hearing. The attorney’s have advised her that she needs to be there. Her care package of Cheetos, Doritos, and Starbucks has been packed. She should be all ready to go. Her wig was even brushed out by her new boyfriend and was ready to go on the bedside table. Yet Britney still hasn’t shown up. What gives?

K-Fed dragged his playa ass out of bed to make the trip to the courthouse. The lawyers all showed up, too. Hell, even the judge decided to come. Yet Britney just didn’t seem to make it – at least, not yet.

Sources for People Magazine claim that Britney has no intention of heading to the hearing today. This is a direct slap in the face to her attorney’s, who informed her that it was incredibly important that she be at the hearing today. After all, the purpose of this hearing is to look at Brit’s recent meltdown and to determine whether or not any rights should be reinstated to the messed up mommy now that K-Fed has been given sole custody of little Sean Preston and Jayden James.

Personally, I think they should allow Britney to just call in. After all, with her busy pop-star career actually going to court can be such a hassle whether it’s for a DUI or custody of your kids. Anyone can work a phone, even Britney, so why not cut her some slack? Besides, the calls would be seriously amusing. I can just picture them now:

County Court Agent: “Hello, Ms. Spears we are ready to connect you with the courtroom.”

Spears: “Who is this? I already have a subscription to Us Weekly. Did you see what them sumbitches said bout me ya’ll?”

Court Agent: “No Ma’am I am not selling magazines. This is about your children. Remember? You have a court hearing today.”

Spears: “Do you know who this is? What kids are you talking about? Is this the FBI? Nothing is wrong with me, Doctor Phil…if you are even a doctor that is. For all I know your first name is fucking Doctor.”

Court Agent: “What are you on lady? I am calling about your hearing for your kids. Sean and Jayden. You know, Sean Preston and Jayden James? Your kids!”

Spears (in her best British Accent): “Just leave me alone! I have a 10:30 appointment with my My Little Ponies.”

Speaking of British accents, check out the following clip of Britney and her wannabe British potty mouth telling the paparazzi to fuck off and leave her the hell alone.

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

Technorati Tags: Britney Spears, Custody Case, No Show, Sean Preston, Jayden James, Kevin Federline, KFed, British Accent, Cracked Out Celebrities, Custody Hearing

While spending time with her kids the other day, Britney decided to leave them in the car to shop for chandeliers. I am sure that the court monitor that was with the kids, in the car, is as impressed as I am. No reason to be bent out of shape though. Everyone knows that court monitors are nothing more than babysitters. Well, that’s true in this case anyway.

There are so many things I could say here. I could comment on how Britney needs to get clean, take a freakin’ bath, and start acting like a mother. However, I am a semi-rational person. I know that won’t happen. In fact, I think the chances of Starbucks growing legs and just attaching itself to Britney’s fat ass would be more likely.

Come to think of it, she might actually like that. Then she wouldn’t have to waste all that time drinking it and stuff. It would already just be an extension of her and more baggage that she could show off.

Technorati Tags: Britney Spears, Moron, Court Monitor, Kids, Sean Preston, Jayden James, Federline, Chandeliers

You know its going to be an interesting day when a skinny little white girl can fuck Snoop Dogg up. We’re not talking a beating or anything here, but he was all sorts of confused when he tried to visit Amy Winehouse. Who could blame him though? I mean, everyone knows that bitch is crazy!

The story goes that Snoop went to visit Wino prior to the European MTV Awards. When Snoop showed up, he didn’t know what to say. The scene was severely messed up to say the least and left Dogg in shock.

Sources for the Mirror say:
“An hour and a half before the show, Snoop said he wanted to see Amy. When we got there, she was in a right state. Everyone, including her management, just stood there as she lobbed spaghetti up the walls. It went on for about five minutes – with her kicking the walls and throwing whatever she could get her hands on – even the tables and the chairs. Then she started cutting up the rug. Snoop was just standing there open-mouthed. He was pretty freaked out by it and didn’t want to hang out with her after that.”

Yeah, I don’t think I would want to hang out with her either. Of course, I wouldn’t have wanted to before I heard this. That’s what he gets for being a pothead. Weed clouds your judgment. Stay clean Dogg! Fo’ Sho’!

Technorati Tags: Amy Winehouse, Snoop Dogg, European, MTV Music Awards, Messed Up, Crazy, Shocked

Mark Vincent Kaplan has been granted an ex-parte hearing on behalf of KFed. Kaplan has a chance to meet with Commissioner Scott Godon. The private hearing also included Sorrel Trope, Britney’s new attorney. Spears and Federline did not attend.

Access Hollywood has been told that the hearing may deal with the September 21 charges that were filed against Spears by the L.A. city attorney Rocky Delgadillo. For those who missed it, the case deals with Britney driving (without a license) and hitting parked cars.

The rumor is that KFed’s camp has seen the latest video of Brit Brit where she is in the driver’s seat with sons Jayden and Sean in the back. According to reports, KFed may want the commissioner to see that tape showing how mommy has been a bad girl.

Technorati Tags: Britney Spears, KFed, Kevin Federline, Custody Hearing, Mark Vincent Kaplan, Sorrel Trope